amanda had a party it was really fun and exciting ... lol
fuck this ... i hate being awake there is nothing to do right now ... im soo boooorrreeedddd... and its only 11 ... i fucking want a car this makes me soo mad all the time ... alot goddamnit .... i dont even know why i am awake ... its cuz aija called and i shoulda called her last night but i didnt cuz im lame.... and it was like somone was txting me a hundred times this morning ... LIKE A HUNDRED.... but it was my alarm ... today is warped tour .. .and the 9th and 10th is skate fest ... i wanna go but i dunno if i like any of the bands ... i gotta get with the times i guess but last year was awesome ... but id go just to fucking go seriously but yea im gonna go ok b ye
so yea i wanna go to a show and be loud withh loud things in a loud setting... fucking at typing is a bitch... im gona need to go the docotors soon i cant stand how bad this sucks ... but i need to do this for future generations ... dude ... o man im soo happy right now ( i have no idea why i just said dude) OMG I LOVE MUSIC i wanna fucking omg scream lyrics and still not hear my voice wtf when is skate fest im fucking goin ... i cant wait ..... i wish i had mad guitar or istramental skills i lack them ... heather is in florida .. she txted me but i think i have no more txts and now its gonna cost me muchos money ... fuckin a .... o man i gotta go bye
cuz i have towork on sunday ... but wateves ... imnot worried at least im only working till 5 ... but staying up all nighting yelling and crying is not whati thoughti would be doing last night ... i was hopingi couldsleep buti still didnt ... i couldnt... i dunno soo much shit is going on .. i have to work to night .... but i dunno i dont wanna ... i wanna curl up in a ball and die i feel like such a fucking bitch ... wow ... andi feel bad for john even knowing about it i shouldnt have said anything ... i feel like such a bitch to josh ... but this is how it had to be andt ahts it ...watevceri thinking im going back to sleep ... later
hanging out wiht heather and adam was fun .... and i like hanging out with john ... we are officially together since monday a 2 in the am lol ... so yea we went and played pool and i wicked sucked at it and then we went to the movies and it was long but a goo dmovie .. but it was exciting
yea so thats theend im gonna miss heather...
im tired even tho i just woke up ... but wateves im out later
but really who has eleven bathrooms ... and who sails ... lol but anyways enough about me being amazed by peoples lives ... uhh yea there was an accident last ngiht by my house involving drunk polish guys hitting a pole ... resulting in me having to walk home ... there was no way to drive around it ... fck drunk people ... anyways ... im soo happy even tho i slept till 230 ... im soo happy i was up really late talking to john about our pj party and i made him promise not to get eaten by sharks today when he went sailing ... cuzi would get very sad ... o yes i did make a new myspace its myspace.com/sexy_chell ... but yea ... i think this is awesome a new month and its like i wiped my slate totally clean and re did it and i guess tomorrow me and ohn (i forgot hes too cool for j's) lol are hanging out with heather and adam before they go far away for ever : ( but i told heather i would mail myself to her lol ... or geta plane ticket and fly down ... o man VISITING FLORIDA oman ... this is awesome im excited im soo happy things couldnt get better ... well they could but i dont wanna get myhopes up ... so ill just shut up .. shut up chell your silly ... lol ... o man i wanan go to the beach again ... its special : D im soo cute ... shut up chell : D dont be silly lol ... im talking to my self im being crazy ... it might be the weird sleep patterns ive been having but watever ... im in such a good mood and music is soo good it makes me wanan drool ... it reminds me of the fall and i wanna go running ... OMG i love running in the fall ... im gonna have to start ... o man im soo cute ... shutup ok i need to go good bye lovelies
i have had thee most awesomest few days ... LIKE YES ... just going on awesome adventures with john to places i have never been to and going to the lake and swimmin lol and swinging and talking to heather again is awesome it sucks that aijas gone tho .. i mean who goes to maine .. i dunno im pretty happy and tonight im going out to mikes which should be sweet ... i dunno but im excited everything is awesome right now.... my redo of summer is going as planned its awesome ... but im out i need to get ready for work
LOL ... wow dude i slept 5 hours last night .. i feel sick right now blah ... i rode the FUCKING TITANIC LOL ... yesterday was crazy ... like i rekindled an old friendship and it was the best feeling in the world ... then i went and caused havoc like the good old days ... lol o man soo much fun ... id tell you the details but i dont feel like it ... all that is important aws that i rode the titanic and the battle cry is the funniest noise ever lol ok bye : D
i just slept until 2 in the afternoon .. now i have to get ready for work ... this is fuckingridiuclous i feel so gross and ugly and fucking stupid and hated........... god somone jsut fucking kill me ... i hate myself soo much i think i made the biggest mistake of my life ...... i just wanna jump.... i cant take this pain .... its sucks .... it hurts so much to know ... like no one cares ......... im soo fucking stupid ........ i fucking cant believe this
fuck this
im done
i cant win
maybe
i wish i could jsut fucking drown my sorrows like i wanna .... o well
in a way i feel good ...
last night i was up until 3 in the morning lol. well i cleaned mr.bobs fish tank so he should be pleased with me. yea i just couldnt sleep, i had alotof things on my brain its just crazy. and kinda sad. i dont know why i even try to correct my writing i dont even care ... im done careing good bye
today was the worst day ... bah it sucked its like a iwasted a day to do nothing soo pointless ... i slept an hour woke up and went to josh's and he got called into work so i stayed at his house by myself till 3 so my mom could pick me up to bring me to the dentist ... the novacaine made me sick and dizzy ... so i went back to josh's and slept more ... really exciting ...what an awesome way to start off my new summer ... damnit ... i suck i feellike shit i just wanna jump off a cliff ... good bye
a month till orientation and 20 mins till i have to go to work. yea im getting a ride, so what, im still cool. im gonna try and make up for the past two months that have sucked and turn it around in this one last month. this last month will be different in the fact that there will be: so pretty much i need to cover all of the basic f's that lead to fun. duh, im gonna need to make severe changes and even tho i have said this before, it must be done. ok so this means: and all of these things will lead to more: none of this has to make sense because i am awesome, and pretty much i like to see bulleted listes of information. they are very informative. not like anyone reads this shit anyways but lol i like to bullet things. plus these bullets are much more safer than their close relatives that get shot out of a gun. damnit i still have time before work. maybe i will color code the lists. yes. look at all of those beautiful colors. god i hate work. lol good think im working with amanda that cool cat lol. wow im bored.
everyone is too busy for me ... because i erally tried to make plans with somone today and all of them are too busy ... maybe im just lame ... maybe its just not worth it anyways cuz i have to work
i wish i had a fucking car that would make me very happy. im still not even awake yet but i feel lik i need to be doing something. life is a waste if you dont use it to its full extent. i had a dream my brother fucked up my computer and that i had to do graduation over again and i got tackled by some hott ass junior? i dunno lol but apparently im good at playing football in my dreams. we had to wear these weird as gowns. it was weird. im still barely awake, the construction guys woke me up. josh isnt even picking up his phone again. i dont even know why i bother. i really just should stop calling him anyways. wateves. i need to shower and wake up. too bad everyone is busy today. nowim gonna be sad and feel left out all day. gay . wateves later dudes
I'll be your friend in hell, until then I despise you. And I probably always will. I cant afford to make another mistake like this. Cause this is more than I can take. I don't mean to leave angry, this is by your own device. I'm sure this comes as no surprise.
My Memories
|December 2003|January 2004|February 2004|March 2004|April 2004|May 2004|June 2004|July 2004|August 2004|September 2004|October 2004|November 2004|December 2004|January 2005|February 2005|March 2005|April 2005|June 2005|July 2005|August 2005|September 2005|October 2005|November 2005
My Blabberbox
My Friends
Da boy
melissa
kristyn
Aija
Josh's old
Josh
Joey
Joe
Jessenia
My Space
Aija's Space
Josh's Space
Stephy's Space