(ill talk after the lyrics ... they set the mood lol)**

the sharper the edge,the cleaner the wound
so i'll be keeping it dull tonight,for i deserve to hurt
disfigure the outside to show how ruined i am
there's no pain and no pleasure when you're too numb to feel

there's a pedistal across the room,
and if i try to climb again
this time the fall is fatal
i dont deserve such an easy exit
so maybe my, spine will snap on impact
and i'l have to crawl away

i'm ready to take that big step
start tearing off the layers i put up
or is it too late to feel anything but what i am?
i dare to find a problem
now it seems, we can fix anything

Just close the door and let me do what I need,
'cause it's better for us if you just let me leave.




****alrighty soy ea im in a wicked shitty mood ... IM FUCKING SOOO TIRED im sooo excited to fucking sleep in .. even tho i still have to work at 9 its better than waking up at likel fucking 530 ... but itskinda my fault that i stayed up (well its all my fault) but i couldnt help it cuz i was talking to josh ... who is like theeee nicest guy ever and he doesnt even understand how awesome he is ... so umm but yea ... im tired and wicked bitchy ... and my mom is like gonna ground me pretty soon for it too ... which is wicked fucked up cuz shes beign more bitchier than i am cuz her fucking mom is coming ... and shes all tweaking about the house being clean and i dont really have time right now to clean i mean yesterday i had an hour and a half to get changed and eat and just sit ... theni worked my ass off cuz it was hard core at work and im gonna have to do it all over again todaybut im only gonna have and hour and hten on friday i have a meet and then my grammas gonna be here when i fuckin get home adn then i have to work saturday 9- 3 but i hope i can chill with josh after work cuz that would totally make my day soo much better ... see the prob with me is im stressed out ... andim sticking by it ... i mean really that has to be it cuz liek my calender ... is soo full its crrazy .... and people think its funnie when im mad too so that makes shit worse so they liek provoke it .... wtf but yea umm im listening to one of jessenias emo kid mixes lol .. its good ... umm yea so now im gonna go and play mario for bit before i have to do work .... josh is awesome